One Extra Letter

September 8, 2010

There was a time when McSweeney’s, a website I continue to adore, routinely accepted my submissions for its “Lists” page. Then, after six, I couldn’t please their discriminating tastes to save my life. This may well be because I became too old, normal, and comfortable to keep my finger on the pulse of the literary zeitgeist. It may also be a response to my submission entitled, “Imagined Excerpts from Ira Glass’s Pre-nuptial Agreement,” which, despite being very clever, caused McSweeney’s to respond as follows:

Appreciate your considering us for this one, but I’m afraid we aren’t going to use it. We tend to steer clear of stuff about people/celebrities who [sic] we know.

Really, it was quite funny. I don’t know anyone who knows Ira Glass, but everyone who saw the list thought, based on his affable radio persona, that he would probably find it amusing, and that includes someone I know who is a public radio producer (and presumably has her finger on the pulse of that particular sub-zeitgeist).

In any event, I refuse to believe that the folks over there at McSweeney’s would be so petty, preferring instead to embrace my own decline into the sort of unhip mediocrity that befits my suburban surroundings. Nevertheless, I submitted what I think is a pretty good one today (came up with it Tuesday night over drinks with crew):

Pornographic subject matter rendered disappointing by the addition of one letter

Moral Sex

Banal Sex

They have to accept that, right?


2 Responses to “One Extra Letter”

  1. Alice said

    You should post the Ira Glass piece on your blog. Even if McSweeney’s doesn’t appreciate it, I bet a whole bunch of us will.

  2. I kept looking at the phrases and adding a letter to the first word, with no success. Well, I got morale sex, which seemed pretty disappointing.

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