I Will Never Be Famous

December 13, 2009

Today, for a brief moment, I had some hope that someday, I might be discovered. This is a remote hope, of course, because I have none of the skills that tend to catapult people to stardom (singing, acting, golf, etc.). But here’s the thing: everyone (or most everyone, anyway) has some sort of special skill that is entirely useless most of the time. In movies, these sorts of skills languish in well-intentioned, hard-luck characters until crucial moments, when the skills become serendipitously useful. In real life, the most use these special skills provide is to amuse others at parties, and even that only works after a number of drinks. If you’re not quite sure what I’m talking about, you’ll understand when I tell you that my special skill is that I can hum the main tune to Peter and the Wolf while simultaneously accompanying myself with a fairly competent human beatbox.

My skill is pretty cool (after a few drinks, anyway), but is it useful? Before today, I would’ve said it was no more useful than, say, the ability to draw Felix the Cat wearing a fitted baseball cap and studio monitor headphones. And then I saw this craigslist ad:


Yes! There is possible remuneration available for obscure skills! But as I said at the outset, I had hope only for a brief moment – specifically, a moment that lasted from the time I saw the craigslist ad to the time I searched for versions of Peter and the Wolf on YouTube. That’s when I discovered there’s actually no hope for me, because if ever there is an ad seeking someone who can beatbox and do Peter and the Wolf at the same time, this guy will totally get the job over me:


One Response to “I Will Never Be Famous”

  1. Alice Michtom said

    LOVE it! And he’s cute, too.

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