Inspected by M.L., 6/8/05

September 29, 2009


Dear M.L.,

Can you believe how time flies?! Crazy, I know. I mean, I can hardly believe it’s been over four years since you last inspected the toilet paper dispenser in the stall closest to the door in the third floor men’s room of my Hartford office building. Four years! So much has changed since then. I mean, when you were last here, my employer was based in a building over on Farmington Ave., and I didn’t even work there yet – I was clerking in Boston then, angling for a job in the public defender’s office, getting used to fatherhood. If you had told me then that I’d end up in Connecticut, of all places, and working right in the building where you inspect toilet paper dispensers, I would have said you were out of your mind.

Shoot, back in ’05, I could barely wrap my mind around the idea of car ownership – and here I am owning a house! Since then I’ve had another son, been through a million ups and downs, seen so many friends come and go. Instead of a rookie lawyer fresh out of school, now I’m, well, not a veteran, exactly, but I have a few years under my professional belt. And Anna – she was just a grad student when you stuck your “inspected by” sticker to the inside of the dispenser, and now she’s a real-life professor, and always worrying about tenure. And Max is in kindergarten, starting to read, and even his brother Reuben, who’s two and a half now, can recognize all his letters.

Anyway, I’d love to know what’s going on with you. Are you still in the toilet paper dispenser inspection game? Still working this same territory? I guess it would be great for you if you got to see some other places – or maybe it doesn’t make a difference? I never wondered if bathroom stalls are different in Waterbury or Litchfield, or if it’s all the same and you’re just as happy to be close to home at the end of the day. Either way, I hope you’re doing well. Park Street definitely isn’t the same without you.

Speaking of that, there’s something I wanted to tell you: About that dispenser in the third floor men’s room: It’s still working OK, I guess, but the plastic cover kept coming off, and so it was just sitting on the floor next to the toilet, and then about a month ago, it just disappeared. It’s not a big deal, really, but the toilet paper roll does sometimes fall off the dispenser, and it’s only a matter of time before it falls into the toilet. Also, I don’t know if this is even your department, but the bathroom has been out of paper hand towels for like three months.

Hope to hear from you soon!




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