Squeeze Tuna Like a Professional

September 21, 2009

If you’re like me, you want to do everything in as professional a manner as possible, which means precision, efficiency, and the latest technology. And it’s important to bring the highest level of professionalism to everything you do, because when you are a professional, your time is money, and a minute wasted on one endeavor, no matter how trivial, is a minute you could have devoted to increasing your net worth. For example, take squeezing the water out of tuna cans. Now, to begin with, I consider myself an extremely adept maker of tuna sandwiches – from the just-so measure of mayonnaise to the addition of chopped apples and celery, I take the lunch classic to the next level every time I prepare it. But for me, a top-flight tuna sandwich is just a step on the road to a high-productivity, professional day: it’s the high-protein brain food that prepares me for networking with movers and shakers, implementing creative strategies, developing my personal brand, etc. In other words, I want to do my tuna sandwich-making in the most professional manner possible, and I want to do it quickly. But time and again, I am stymied by the cumbersome and amateurish labor required to drain the water from my tuna cans, losing precious seconds I might later devote to leveraging, implementing, or other highly professional activities. Thankfully, the good folks at Farberware have me covered:


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